When we hit the innermost parts of our shattered emotions, when we come to the very end of a long rope, when we feel as though we cannot move another inch...because of this devastating divorce, what course of action do we take?
Each one of us can tell horror stories of what this divorce has done to us...right? We can share stories of abuse of all kinds, we are unable to trust another soul, we are grasping for anything that sheds a glimmer of light for our frazzled life, and the horror of our realities send us to our knees in a fetal position, where we cannot even move. And when we come to that kind of emotional and physical state, it is at that point when satan seems to get the best of us. All we want is a defense from all the lies. All we want is a way out of our bleeding heart. All we want is freedom from the entangled web we are trapped in...but we fall into our minds, and our minds scream for a great escape and a listening ear. Is there something out there?
Is this the kind of life God really wants for me? If this is what life is all about, then this is all God's fault! I've tried my best! I've done what is right! I've always stood for family values...and this is what I deserve? Have you ever thrust your fist up to God, and let Him know just how badly you feel? Do we really feel like this is all God's fault?
Then, what is the answer to all of this chaos? Why does my life have to filled with this kind of emotional bouncing ball. One person just cannot take this much drama...it's way too much! THE WET BAR! Now there's the answer! If I drink my way through this, then I won't have to deal with all of this...I can just sleep my way out of this. Sounds good to me! I just cannot take this pain...it's way too much for me to bare...and so you take a drink...to help ease the pain.
It's very easy to reach for that drink. It doesn't talk back to you. It doesn't lie to you...or does it? It certainly relaxes the mind and body. Now, there's the key to dealing with this thing called divorce. Just can't take it anymore...
One divorcee tells of a time when he literally stayed drunk for days, because the pain was too much for him to bear. It got to the point where he had to admit himself into rehab...it just got that bad. There are many other addictions we can find ourselves in if we are not looking up - to God. Those escapes can be another relationship - a bad choice when you are still grieving the estranged spouse. It can be a bad case of plunging yourself into work that you find no time or reason to be with family members who love you. It can be an irresponsibility of spending too much...just because you don't care anymore...and you really don't want what you shopped for. Or...is it too convenient...just a walk to your medicine cabinet...or a call to your doctor...for more pain medication or sleep medication?
But what are the results to these kinds of escapes? Is is long-term? Does it get results? Does it bring on more problems and misunderstandings from family members? Is your escape becoming way too expensive? What is your drug to keep you floating through this storm of divorce?
Some of us don't want to hear another Bible verse...it's just another way of Sunday Sue to get us to church...right? Some of us don't want to hear about another person finding their way to God...it hasn't worked for us, so why bother...right? Or is your heart viable enough to reach out to a few verses of scripture, so that you will hear it and really know that God has given you this verse for yourself? Here it is....
Therefore, (your name) be careful how you walk, not as unwise men (women), but as wise, making the most of your time, because the days are evil, so then, (your name) do not be foolish, but understand what the will of the Lord is. And do not get drunk with wine, but this is dissapation (acute consumption), BUT BE FILLED WITH THE SPIRIT! ...ALWAYS GIVING THANKS FOR ALL THINGS IN THE NAME OF OUR LORD! Ephesians 5:15-18
Wait...the Bible tells me to be filled with the Spirit and be thankful for all things? Are you kidding me? When I have just been betrayed by the one I committed my life to? When I have just been abandoned by the one I spent my entire life with? When I have just been accused of wretched things that I am not even capable of, and the Bible tells me to be filled with the Spirit?
When we come to these depths of the human soul with great pain and soul searching, then that is the place where God can do His best for us. He wants us to reach out to Him before we reach out to that glass of wine...because his peace lasts a long time. His grace is immediate and proves that He is indeed God to us in that moment. Our praise to Him acknowledges to Him that we cannot do this on our own. Our praise to Him gives hope to others who know what we are going through. Our praise to Him brings us strength deep within our souls instead of a fogginess of mind with our drink.
It's our choice. It's up to you! Will you choose the great escape, or choose to take the high road, and live in God's Spirit, allowing Him to be your pillow that you cry on at night, and allowing Him to take you places, protect you from the evil one, and provide for you beyond your wildest wishes? It cannot be an escape...it must be a journey relying on the Great Spirit of God!